No, columnist Katherina Riesner is not schizophrenic. After living in different places, she simply wonders how many identities she has developed.
When I told a friend of mine after graduation that I would be moving to Sweden for my master’s degree, the first thing she asked wasn’t what made me choose Sweden or whether I was excited, scared, or afraid of the northern climate. Instead she asked me what I thought “Swedish Kat” would be like. Now that my time in Lund is slowly coming to an end I have been wondering the same thing.
Growing up in Germany, I know what ‘German Kat’ is like: She is punctual, determined, organized but also a stickler for rules, a tad impatient and has a certain skepticism for new people she meets. Unlike her, ‘American Kat’ is more outgoing and loud, but also relaxed, and weirdly patriotic of this country that is not technically hers.
Even though at first I didn’t think it would happen, looking back at my time in Lund, I got to be a third person here – that ‘Swedish Kat’ my friend asked about two years ago.
Some of the typically Swedish characteristics have now become my own. ‘Swedish Kat’ is more polite, trading in some of the directness that Germans are known for, and she is more patient, accepting that sometimes you have to wait in line to get something you want.
On the other hand, I picked up some trades that I could probably do without. I have developed a slight addiction to candy, coffee and all things cinnamon. Besides, life in Sweden has made me more aware of my personal space. I hadn’t realized this until last week when someone sat on the chair next to me in the library, even though there was an empty table a few meters away.
Swedish me was first thrown into a state of shock – not knowing what to do with this strange behavior, trying to come up with a reasonable answer for such blatant misconduct – and then became increasingly uncomfortable, twitching around in my seat until I couldn’t take it anymore, got up and left.
None of these experiences are necessarily unique to my life or even dependent on living in different places. As author John Green says, “we are all making ourselves and each other up all the time”, no matter where we are.
Still, I feel that living abroad adds another ingredient to this potpourri of identities; the opportunity for an extra nuance, the trace of a ‘new Kat’, and for that all three of my selves are grateful.
